The Magic Tree

The Magic Tree

There's a tree outside my balcony that I have always thought special. You see, I've lived here for over 7 years; longer than I have lived anywhere since leaving home over 25 years ago. That tree has morning doves and squirrels and all the typical kinds of life of a South Florida tree.

The reason the tree outside my balcony is a "magic tree" evolved like this:

About a decade ago I was squandering about on Miami Beach, where I lived, having fun and whooping it up at the local bars. One night I was at a particular local dive bar with a so called "friend". I guess she thought some guys at the bar should hook up with me (she wanted to be alone with her pirate guy) so she told them my name. We were all sitting at the bar and these guys kept saying my name "Virginia....Virginia...Virginia". Each time I turned around, they just said "Hi" and didn't really have anything of interest to say.

Later that evening my "friend" wanted to be alone in my apartment. She recommended that I phone up the guy at the bar who was interested in me. He had put his cell phone number on my phone so I did call him up. He said to come downstairs and meet him; he would be waiting outside in his car. I felt especially weird...things were slowing down considerably and I really only remember leaving my apartment to go meet him outside but nothing else until the next morning when I put my key into the apartment and opened the door. My "friend" was there with her pirate guy and asked where I had been.

I went to the Police Station later that day because I noticed that I was completely bruised all over my body and the woman at the police station told me it appeared that I had been beaten up. I thought perhaps I had had too much to drink and had fallen down the stairs, but she said the bruises appeared to be inflicted by someone else.

So I called the cell phone of the guy with whom I was supposed to meet but he hung up and that cell phone number was no longer available after that. It then occurred to me that he had probably drugged my drink in hopes to rape me.

I was having horrible nightmares so I went to a shrink, who gave me Seroquil, a drug used for many purposes, one of which is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I did, in fact, remember a significant part of that experience in a dream where I was struggling to get free of this man in his car. In the dream I remember telling him that he could not rape me please because I had inside of me a tampon. I remember (in the dream/reality/repressed memory) him telling me that it didn't matter to him about the tampon and that he didn't care that it was still inside of me while he raped me. I dreamed that I was screaming so loudly that some people came over to the car...he must have let me go at that point, as there was no evidence on my body of rape - only of terrible bruises as if a struggle.

One night, after taking my Seroquil and while sleeping on my couch, I woke up and looked out at the tree outside my balcony. There were smiling faces in it. The faces did not disappear until well after I had been awake and had been staring outside the sliding glass doors for some time. They just faded away slowly, but they were very cool and I like them. I suppose it was an hallucination brought on by the Seroquil. They were spirits to protect me, living in the tree.

Ever since then, when I look at the tree outside my balcony, I feel the energy of something outside this tangential reality. I think the cats feel it too, for they love to go out onto the balcony and stare into the tree. This evening I noticed a huge dragonfly buzzing around. It hovered before me as if to say "hello". Dragonflies used to frighten me but I learned that you have to learn to recognize that what was initially appealing may be truly frightening, and what is frightening-looking may be an angel.